You know when you listen to a song and it irks you? I listened to a bullshit song today. Some paean to the notion of what women want in a man. Or a particular type of woman. It was full of guff about open arms, holding doors, knights hidden inside shabby suits. I wasn’t angry at the songwriter for putting this guff in a song. He’s a canny man. He knows his audience. It’s a nonsense, though. Nobody, man or woman, can be all the things in that song.

What men and women should be is adult enough to cope with the parallel flaws of another adult. You can’t write a song about that, though.

I’m not saying that people don’t want to be held, to have their insecurities assuaged, to be freed by the knowledge that someone loves them. I’m saying don’t expect another person to validate you, or give you things you should be able to give yourself. We should be our own validation. Confirmation from someone else of how amazing we are is a bonus.

Just for the record, I am romantic. Rapunzel is my favourite fairytale. I like the bit where the prince goes blind.